Just A Little Bit Farther

Pic Courtesy of Morguefile.com

I don't tend to write when I am feeling overwhelmed, irritable, exhausted, and physically hurting. It's not that I choose to hide real life from you but more that I just don't think someone wants to read about all that. It's depressing. It's boring. It's not fun.

I just turned a little Jonathan David Helser on. It made me want to take one of my walls and use it as a canvas, just to pour out my prayers through a paint brush. Helser tends to do that to me.

Instead, I decided to write, which is another creative love of mine.

However, a certain little 15 month old has woken from his nap and the rest of the crew will be walking in the door in a few moments.

I feel selfish, because I really, really, really want to take a long weekend away by myself or with a few girls. I want to take my journal, my paints, my computer, and music like Helser's with me. I want to inhale fresh air, shake off the daily duldrums of motherhood, and I want to be refreshed.

For as much as I love being a mama and being married to my main man, there are days that I feel like I don't like them very much. Lately, there have been several days like that. Which makes me feel worse. Since I really, really do love them more then words can say.

So, I've realized that is more me, not them. I just need to dig deeper, spend a little more time in the Word, jack up more authentic worship music, and love on my family like nobody's business. And once it stops all this torential raining, I think I need to get out and do some hiking.

Well, there you go. Just a plain ol post about a grumpy mama. How's that for reading???